Assassination Nation Review
Assassination Nation really, REALLY wants to shock you. At the start, it even gives out a warning, listing out all the offensive and shocking things coming up, along with a very quick clip of them all. That’s how cool and edgy it thinks it is. It’s all parties and social media, girls are all bitchy, boys are all idiots. And it’s all strung together with bad editing, loud jarring music and a nonsensical plot. Maybe I’m just a little too old, but I found the whole thing more annoying than shocking.
So, I think what they did with this movie is start at the end and then try and work their way backwards. They had this really cool idea of having four schoolgirls, all dressed in red and armed with guns and swords, ready to take on a town of crazy people wearing masks. And then they tried to come up with some kind of plot which will get them to that point. The answer they came up with is in the form of hacking, exposing everyone’s data so that mob mentality ensues and the girls have no choice but to fight back.
The hacking begins with some more of the towns more prominent figures. The local mayor has all his private, kinky photos released, resulting in him publicly committing suicide. Then the local principal, a kind family man, has all of his messages and photos exposed. He has photos of his 6 year old daughter taking a bath on his phone, so obviously he’s branded a paedophile?! The next logical step? Form a large crazed mob, demanding his resignation and terrorising his family by smashing his front door down. It’s shocking right? Right? No. No, it’s not. It’s all just annoying nonsense.
Pointless split screen scenes, dull voice-over narration, dramatic music that simply doesn’t match the scene it’s in. Character reactions, actions and interactions that are just complete nonsense.
Ok, so we’ve got the whole town acting like they’re in a Purge movie, now we need to get the girls involved with guns and stuff. So, let’s have their data exposed next – nudes, details of the married man they’ve been texting etc. Then let’s get somebody to falsely accuse one of girls of being responsible for all the hacking that’s been going on so that the whole town hates her and her friends and is either trying to arrest them or kill them. And then ensure that the girls come across a stash of guns and knives laid out on the floor. There you go, job done, there’s our movie. Five minutes in a pub, draft script scrawled on the back of a beer mat.
To be fair, at that point the movie does improve in quality, but it’s all too little too late. There isn’t a single interesting or memorable character in the whole thing, nothing to make you care or believe in anything you’re seeing. And as I mentioned earlier, the whole thing is a complete mess. Pointless split screen scenes, dull voice-over narration, dramatic music that simply doesn’t match the scene it’s in. Character reactions, actions and interactions that are just complete nonsense. Officially one of the worst movies I have seen this year.
My watch-list of movies and TV shows continues to grow, while my spare time continues to shrink. Occasionally though, I’ll manage to tick one off the list, and then try to come up with some words about it that make me sound as though I know what I’m talking about. “Once he has discovered something, he wants to be off onto the next thing, rather than spending time and elaborating” – snippet from my primary school report, confirming that I am, and always have been, easily distracted.